Les Miseres et les Mal-Heurs de la Guerre

Dear everybody,

My new chapbook is out and available on Greying Ghost. Buy everything they have in print because all the things they print are good.

Here the link:

http://www.airforcejoyride.com/gg21.html

Wooves or Dears

Dear Readers,

I went to the Berrydale show last night at the Okay Mountain and really enjoyed the thing. Ryan Lauderdale reallocates church camp group portraits by updating them in psychedelic prismatic explosions. Michael Berryhill lifts images from Renaissance painting, plants them out of doors at goldenhour, and surrounds them with a detritus of electronics, wires, and trash. The two artists represented together demonstrate a continuum of appropriation. Looking at the work, it feels like you've been here before, but, no, you couldn't have. It just doesn't look like the reality you're used to.

On a related note, I was in the Arts and Leisure Department of the NYT this morning and found this: 'Head On' by Cai Guo-Qiang

Yesterday I saw some carved Deerheads in a 2nd street boutique (made me want to barf, that boutique did, but that is no story for now), so I ask you, dear reader, what have you seen more of lately: Deerheads or Wolves?

HI All

It seems that this blog has been fizzling out as of late. SO.......I have a challenge. The next person that post on austin home for boys will win the honors of naming my fictional donkey that I have been thinking about for the last few days. It looks like this.



They are such wild critters. They are also natural foes of coyotes and larger normal horses. Wow god is amazing.

Herr Kraut's Tips for Boys: How to Make It in This Big Lonely World #2

Hi Boys and Boys,

Herr Kraut's tip this week is all about an Austin staple of style and un-style: shorts.

Cargo Shorts:

Herr Kraut says, "Cargo Shorts make you look like a dickhole."

My dumb face.

Ok.

I am getting better. Though I did try to unlock my house with my car remote clicker thing. That, of course, did not work. I also have no recollection of what happened. If I repeat myself or give you funny looks it is not because I hate you. It is just because I am several shades of stupid. I also have knocked some serious appetite in me. I can’t stop eating. Quarter pounders, pizza, enchiladas, everything has been going in me at an astounding rate of speed and proportions. wow!!!!!!!!

I don’t recommend head trauma.

I don’t recommend head trauma.
Hey all! I managed to knock some serious stupid in me on Monday. I can’t remember a lot of Monday and it is really scary. Out of all the things I would want removed from my brain, some arbitrary Monday is not one of them.
Here is a list of things I wish were removed.

1. 7th and 8th grade.
2. The time I managed to burn every bridge in Chicago.
3. Breaking up with someone on her birthday.
4. Breaking up with someone after they bought me dinner.
5. Thanksgiving 2007
6. Christmas 2004
7. May 6th 2006

You don't need a 12 inch spoon to stir the elf puddin'

OMG have I been behind updating the adventure! Halla daze and mudder-in-laws have keep me from the sweet sweet Blogoglobe, so you're going to have to get your gentleman's gaming club dose of campaign news all in one big blotchsplotch.

That's right, you don't need a 12 inch spoon to stir the fresh elf puddin', but it helps if you want to be 9 inches from the bowl.

Tonight marked the triumphant return of Daniel Lane. He did all kinds of spell casting that he learned from his highschool daze. Did you know that Daniel Lane was a high school sophomore on 9/11? Well you do now. All that terror and fear as a teen made him practice hard in the arts of spellcraft and deception. He was training to join the CIA and cast WMD on the American Public, but he went into the art field instead.

I know, inspirational story. Also an inspirational story, how Daniel Lane cast sleep on a group of creepy hobgoblins and then we all bloodbathed their stinky butts with Coup d' Grace. Yeah, I know, if that were a frozen treat you purchase from the icecream man, you'd be ordering the Badassicle.

Anyway, you got a lot of reading to do. Our adventurers are in the Sunless Citadel and all hell is breaking loose. More action than Lost re-runs or Jay Leno writing his own jokes. (how did he get that job in the first place. Remember that dorritos commercial where he ate a chip and started a motorcycle. I swear, Leno is like my dad, except my dad is funny. And attractive. And 60 today. Go dad.)

So, here is 3 weeks of quest. Broken down by bloodbath.

12/19, Decsent into the Citadel, Vagina of Adventure.

Enemies Defeated:
8 Twig Blights5 Skeletons





1/3, Rimjobbing the Underground Hallways, a Rectal River of Stench

Enemies Destroyed:

7 Dire Rats
1 Momma Dire Rat6 Goblins




1/10, In the Goblin Stronghold, XBox, Blunts, Mickies, Hell Yeah! Biggie 4 Eva!

Enemies Vanquished

9 (count 'em), 9 Goblins4 Hobgoblins (We talked too much in the Hallway. Mipo got scared. Retep walked through the door like he was Elliot Ness on a Saturday night.)

And 1 Hobgoblin Boss